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papuja

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  1. The situation is directly comparable to an abusive relationship. I'd give, you'd take. You'd punish, I'd beg. It's called emotional altering to establish dominance over others: "Such persons manipulate and pressure others to change so as to avoid having to change themselves, and use power over others to escape an inner emptiness. " Telling me I am useless hurt me on a personal level. Even a slightest bit of appreciation would have been enough or a simple thank you before letting me go. If that's how I'm seen in this clan, I don't think I want to be a part of it anymore. Like I said, I don't want to build that bridge alone. I want to build it together. Since you seem to think of me as a nobody, I guess that won't come to be. I didn't want to be yet another cog in the system. I wanted to be a friend. I know you won't change. I already know you won't do anything for this. But take this with a grain of salt, won't you? You might learn something new about yourself.
  2. An era has come to an end. I've lost my status in AC due to a member cut made by Sp33dy. You probably haven't heard of me. And that's okay. I usually work on the back end of stuff and am not that social with people. I admit. I'm not active on TS or forums. Just don't point out the obvious, please. I'll explain them in the end. But first, it's time for a nice doseadge of melancholy driven nostalgia. 10 months ago on dmm, I talked to a nice guy for a while and we became friends. He told me to join this CC called Sp33dy20. This clan and me went through a lot together. I scouted kills. I solved drama. We played the tournament together. When we massed, the whole wilderness was in our hands. But then the seasonal started. I kinda dropped out since I didn't play it. - The last few months I only moderated some dramas, traced down IP's, pen tested the server mechanics and stuff.. Not a part of the social side of the community, but rather the technical one. Anyways. I'm not welcome here anymore. You probably don't care. I'm not asking for you to care either. I just wanted to leave a legacy to the community I held so dear. For you, dear reader, I want to tell you this. Please be kind to each other. You are a family. Cherish it Final words: I loved AC. After what we've been through, hearing from Sp33dy that I'm useless really hurt.. I might not be active on ts and forums, but I always was here when you needed me. I tracked IP's, taught you internet security, pen tested servers, solved drama, recruited new members, etc. Being left behind isn't easy. It is understandable. But I can't see the reason for burning bridges. Speedy, I know you're going to read this, so please hear my word. I enjoyed the time I spent with you. I'm sad that it had to end this way. I stand by my statements about TS and forums and am not willing to change my habits unless I feel so myself for the reasons stated above. I just hope you could understand my point of view. I'm not going to stare at the bridge waiting for it to extinguish and build my way back to you all alone. I'm now going to turn around and walk away with dignity. If you find it in your heart to reconcile though, I'd be happy to build back that bridge together. You've already been forgiven. Now, I shall say farewell. It sure has been a ride. I wish you all the best and thank you for everything. Kiitos ja kaikkea hyvää teille, mitä ikinä tulevaisuus tuokaan tullessaan. -Papuja --------------------------------------- Explanation for forum and ts inactivity. Please no bitching in the comments. Try to understand my point of view: TS: I'm shy. Really shy. When I talk, everyone just talks on me. Not to mention as a non native english speaker, it literally hurts my head to listen to too much english at once. Just "idling" is a pain for me. When I do talk, I usually just get made fun of. Usually because I use so called "sophisticated" vocabulary when talking and told "don't bring that technical shit here bro, it's just RS". Countless cases of such. Even when I was offering free programs that I write to AC members, but was told "shut up dude, nobody cares about that nerd shit". Stuff like this sure encourages to hang out in ts. I got so demotivated by that that I never finished the script I was working on. Forums: I believe in quality, not quantity. I made a problem solving format for example a few months ago regarding the drama that was going on. (can't find a link since I'm downgraded to a guest) Wrote it for 2 hours. Just to be made fun of again. *sigh* I don't want to shitpost. Commenting is pointless unless you're there to make a point in my opinion. The step of making a comment worth commenting is very demanding. An "Ayy lmao" is not enough for me. Therefore I won't post.
  3. Distributing justice with my mighty fire bolt in the name of AC! I'd like to say my congratulations to the winner, Fog and thank my parents and friends for... Jkjk. In all seriousness, it was really fun playing with you guys and we all worked very hard for this. This might be one of my fondest Runescape memories that I have had and will probably ever have. Made so many new friends, even finally got accepted to ac during this time. This has been utterly awesome. Thank you very much everyone from the bottom of my heart! -Love from Finland, Papuja Bonus picture: I call it "When you gotta go celebrate easter but tourny is life"
  4. Thanks! Today even more. ~150 gems, 1170 chaos runes, 1000+ nats and 200k stack... My hand is killing me.
  5. So I spent my day thieving in ardy. I've gained some gems to be crafted and enchanted, chaos runes for training, etc. I'll be distributing these to people tomorrow when I'm online! ^^ So get ready for your shiny new recoils in the near future! Ps. Good job guys with the pking today. Been following you on ts and you're all doing great! #tatacleared Day 3: Collected and gave away 1170 chaos runes and a total of ~150 gems to the clan. Proceeded to sell 200k cash stack and over 1k nats. This is the first batch of gems and chaos runes. Don't have any pictures of the second one, but it was even bigger. And swapping gold and nats make b0nk! This money is freaking huge for me! Thieving level is up to 85, will probably be doing rogue's chest tomorrow. Just need prayer up and some potions! The food and gem train keeps on rolling! I'll probably upload some screenshots tomorrow. Got a few new friends too so today was a good day. 3 days left so keep the grind up guys! ^^ Sidenote: Idk if anyone is interested in this stuff. I'd sure like to know how others are progressing too. If you consider this shitposting, just say it straight and it's gone!
  6. Was really fun! My first pk trip with you guys too. Hope my d spears helped out! ^^ Gj everyone and hope you got some nice loots.
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